The Gods are Effing With Me!

I need to go back to bed! Seriously, we all have "those mornings" when as soon as your feet hit the floor everything is effed up to the nth degree. This would be one of those mornings.

Mine actually started about 4:15. Woke up from an odd dream. I was looking over an autopsy report of my dad's and there was a compound on the report that stood out. I don't know, sometimes I think he visits me in my dreams. But dad didn't have an autopsy done, we know what killed him. So, this a.m. I googled succinate, and it's actually a compound in high blood pressure medicine. Honestly, I don't even know if he was taking blood pressure med. I know his mom used to, but I don't know if dad did. Needless to say, when I dream of dad, it's hard for me to get back to sleep. But, I finally did after about an hour of tossing around. Oh and hubby informed me succinate is in many drugs, maybe a preservative. Weird.

6:45 a.m. I wake and it's too quiet. Our daughter is normally awake by 6:20 now that school has resumed. I knew she wasn't awake as soon as I came out of the bedroom. Her light was off, and the house just had that feel that everyone was still asleep. Opened the door to let her know she had overslept. Out she flies from her bed, and I hurry downstairs to make coffee.

Open my e-mail to check it, and there is one from one of the book renters I rented a book from. Long story short, I thought I received an incorrect book from them, shipped it back, and they let me know that wasn't the book they shipped to me. I have no clue where this other mystery book came from. I double checked the book they did ship me, I still have it, and do need it for class. So they will be shipping the wrong book back to me. I still have no clue where it came from!

Looking over a bill I had paid off on Wednesday and I realized that the most recent statement I received from them didn't reflect the most recent payment that we sent in. Needless to say, I sent in way too much money to them. Will have to wait until they process payment and send the residual amount back to us. I just hate when that happens, as it seems to take longer to get money back from places.

I knew we had thunderstorms roll through last night, and even heard them a little. Normally if it's a bad storm, I try to be more aware of the weather and the effects we can feel since we live in the Midwest. Not last night! Slept through it, but apparently kids heard them. And apparently they were bad! Like our youngest was super scared, and our oldest son said the thunder sounded like it was right overhead. Nope slept through the entire event. Thankfully we didn't have the wind damage like other areas of the city received.

Needless to say, for a Friday, it sure feels like a Monday to me! I need to go back to bed and start this day over.

Sorrow and Pride

I wish I had my camera today, and I wish I wasn't rushing to an appointment. I would have stopped and paid tribute to a young man who died in a foreign land. US Army Spc. Spencer Duncan was one of the many that died when the Chinook helicopter was downed recently in Afghanistan.

This is the closest I've been to witnessing a hero's homecoming.

As I was driving along 151st street in Olathe, I noticed hundreds of American flags were placed along each side of the road, and people were beginning to gather to pay tribute to this young man as he was transported from a local airport to a funeral home.

The emotion that welled up in me was sorrow. I wanted to feel proud that people came out to greet him, but the sorrow was too overwhelming. I think it's because his age hits too close to home. Our son is 20, that could be our son. The young man is someone's son.

I understand we have a mission over there. I get that. But for how much longer? This region of the world has never wavered or backed down. Look how long they held the Russians back, and the Russians finally admitted failure and left. It is hard to beat a regime that has their tendrils reaching worldwide. When will we realize that? How many sons, fathers, and brothers have to be lost? How many more hero's homecomings do we have to witness?

So, on my way home, I quickly snapped with my cellphone this flag that was still there. After the crowds left, it still stood. Passing in the other direction was a motorcyclist that was carrying an American flag. I imagine he was part of the procession to the funeral home, but was heading elsewhere. Somewhere in the sadness, I too felt proud. Fleeting as it was, it was nice to know that hundreds had gathered to pay tribute to a life that was lost too soon.

In the World of Should, Could, & Would

Those three words are probably my biggest annoyance. Here's a piece that's been running through my mind for days, it doesn't come from anywhere in particular, or anyone. However, it can be applied to so many things that happen in our lives.

How could you? Why would I? You should have. If you would have. I could have. Why should I? How could I? Why should you? I should have. You could have.

Those three words usually come about after the fact. When its easy to place the blame, placate our guilt, or regret things you should, could, or would have done. It may be pride, anger, pain, or other things that are holding you in the pattern of those three words. I'm not immune to them, and being a creature of habit, it's hard to change.

Life is too short to let those words rule your life. Reach out to those you should have, where you could have, and perhaps they would do the same. Quit making excuses, and get out there and do it. Change those three words to: shall, can, and will. Be it interpersonal relationships, your home, or yourself, change those words. You just might change yourself.

Book Review: Retribution by Sherrilyn Kenyon

Ok so I have this wee obsession with all-things Sherrilyn Kenyon. A friend of mine suggested I, "check out her Dark-Hunter series." I am always on the look-out for a new series to read. Added bonus, these are paranormal, so I was certainly willing to check out the books. That was March 2010. By May 2010 I had read 13 of her books. Yes 13 books in 2 months. Crack! Crack I say! To feed my addiction, she and Dianna Love, whom she's co-authored now 2 other series with, came to town. We had the opportunity to go up and meet these two lovely ladies, and not only are they down-home, they actually took their time with us crazy fans. Since then, I've amassed quite the collection of Sherrilyn's books, and eagerly await each new book when it hits the shelves.

Since this is my first review and if you aren't familiar with the Dark-Hunter series, you may ask,"What is a Dark-Hunter?". The Greek God Apollo decided around eleven thousand of years ago he could one-up Zeus by creating his own race of people that would be better than humans, thus the Apollites were created. The Apollites queen, who used to be Apollo's lover, became jealous when Apollo took a human lover and the human gave birth to a son. The Apollite queen sent her guards to murder Apollo's lover and son. Apollo, in a rage, cursed his own people to die slowly and painfully at the age of 27; the same age as his mistress. In steps the last remaining Goddess of the Atlantean pantheon, Apollymi, who shows the Apollites how to elongate there lives by consuming human souls. As long as that soul lives, the Apollites continue to live, but turn into Daimons. They have to continually take in souls to live. Artemis creates warriors, called the Dark-Hunters to kill the Daimons and free the human souls. These people have usually been wronged by someone in their lives, and scream out for vengeance as they lay dying. Artemis hears those screams and visits the person, offers them the chance to seek vengeance for their death and to join her race of warriors called the Dark-Hunters. Since they take on the characteristics of the Daimons, Artemis figured if they were like the Daimons, it would be easier to hunt them. The Daimons can't go out in sunlight, have fangs to consume the soul--although Dark-Hunters don't do that--but do get the teeth, and supernatural powers.

Now back to Retribution. It came out August 2nd. I picked it up at the book store August 3rd, and finished it the next evening. Yes, these books are that good. 432 pages of another great story in the long line of her Dark-Hunter series. One thing that I really liked is that she has visited yet another pantheon. She originally started with the Greek Pantheon, but has also included Atlantean, and Sumerian Pantheons. She now has stepped into the world of Native American lore. Yeah!

With Sherrilyn's series, her characters overlap in her books. William Jessup Brady, aka "Sundown," was introduced very early on in the Dark-Hunter series (book 3 to be exact), but hadn't been in other books. Luckily he got his own! If I've counted right, Sundown's book is number 19.

Sundown is relocated to Las Vegas after having lived in Reno for many years, and runs into an issue with a human running with Apollites that are killing other Dark-Hunters. He soon realizes that Abigail is the little girl he once knew that is grown up and gunning for him. "Orphaned as a toddler, Abigail Yager was taken in by a family of Apollites and raised on one belief: Dark-Hunters are the evil who prey on both Apollites and mankind. They must all be destroyed. While protecting her adoptive race, she has spent her life eliminating the Dark-Hunters and training for the day when she meets the man who killed her family… Jess Brady." Because of her actions, she almost creates an Apocalypse. With the help of Sundown, another Dark-Hunter--who is first introduced in this book--named Ren (I know you will see him again!) and a few other characters, they have to try to avert the end of the world.

The dialog as usual is quick-witted, humorous, and page turning. I know this is book 19(ish), and I recommend you start all the way at book one. This way you know the entire story. Especially since at the end of Retribution is a bonus scene that you have to know who the people are in order to appreciate it!

Growing Up and Moving On

Life is such a mysterious thing. You never know what twists and turns will be thrown at you at a moments notice. You can akin it to a roller coaster, I sometimes like to compare it to a tornado. To say I've had my ups and downs, twists and turns, is an understatement. However, when our oldest son informed me he had decided to move out of the home, and move to Boulder, Colorado; I wasn't thrown for a loop like I thought I would feel. At some point, as a parent, you know your child will move away. I think it's surprised me more that it's happening so fast. It really has been less than a month since his decision has been made. Tomorrow he will be loading up his belongings onto the truck, and heading out there to get settled, apply for jobs, and come home to wrap up some personal things. He plans to start back with college once he establishes residency. If you know us, you know this is a huge deal. Our oldest hasn't always been the most motivated, and I do feel this is the best thing he can do for himself. I can feel the excitement in him; see confidence in him that I've never seen before. I think it's been easier on me, for the simple fact that he is moving there with one of his best friends. They've been like brothers since the 3rd grade, through some tough situations, and have been there for each other through it all. It will be a good change for our son, and a chance for him to grown and learn on his own.

Today, I helped him take apart his bed. He's waiting for his friend to arrive with the moving truck, so he can load his belongs onto it. I promised myself I wasn't going to cry while only packing his belongings. Yet my heart had other plans, and I couldn't stop from shedding some tears. You can't help but to flash back to the moment you laid eyes on your child, and think, "where did the years go?" The late night feedings, the first day of school, the numerous games you sat through--even when the sun was blazing hot, the ups and the downs that have been thrown our way. Even through all the good and the bad, as a parent you know that your love never wavers for your child. I know.... blah blah, roots & wings. But it still hurts to see them leave. They are opening a new chapter on their life, as you are closing a chapter in your life.

I think today has been a bit of a melancholy day for me. Today's my mom's birthday, which means she's another year older. I've also been dealing with the emotions of our son moving out, and I'm missing my dad today. I know when other things are happening in my life, it's usually when I miss my dad the most, because I know I can't call him. I don't know if that feeling will ever change. :(

Ask me later how I feel, when it is time for him to walk out the door for the final time. But for now, I am proud of his decision and wish him the best of luck. As for any advice I can give him: strap in, buckle up, and hold on tight. It's going to get bumpy along the way, and I'll do the same.

Back to School = Where'd the money go??

I love the idea of back to school. Back to a routine, back to normal, and not having to hear on a daily basis, "What are we gonna do today?" But there are many things I dislike about this time of year.

First off, I know I shouldn't complain about the public education system where our kids attend school, as it is one of the top school districts in the nation. But, our pocketbook sure screams at the top of its lungs in protest. Really? Daughters registration today was more than our first car--well, almost. Her registration totaled $396, granted that included a yearbook and PSAT payment, alongside the rest of the required fees. Did I mention our first car cost $500? Youngest sons fees were $167. I'm glad we only have two kids in school. It really hurt when all three kids were in school.

Second, it's time to hit the back-to-school sales. Call me cheap, but if any school supplies can be salvaged from the previous year, it gets reused. What doesn't get reused seems to end up in our cabinet of art supplies. If I was really smart, I would pick through all those items, and could probably supply our entire block's back-to-school supplies. Maybe that's what I should do... Sell our own stuff at dirt rate prices, and make a little money in the process!

Third, back-to-school sales. They lure you into their stores with the advertisements in the Sunday paper. After all, you don't want your kid to look like a schlump on the first day of school. Buy their clothes, and your kids will look like they should be modeling for Gap Kids. In reality, youngest wakes up with his hair going every which way, and no matter how much water and goop I put on his hair, that last piece is determined to stick out the entire day. Back to those advertisements, those kids are in jeans. Our kids go back to school when it's still 100 degrees outside. I have to hold off on jean buying until the last possible minute. Son always manages to wear out the knees, or has a growth spurt. So, generally I avoid purchasing many clothes for back to school.

In addition to all their school expenses, I too will go back to school. This will be my second year back. I'm grateful hubby makes a decent living, but with that, I can't qualify for any help with school. Everything is out of pocket. I just hope, once my schooling is done, I'll be able to find a job!

So, faster than Lestat can drain a human, back-to-school has drained our pocketbook.